Most ADHDers go through a big surge of overwhelming emotions after their diagnosis.
The Emotional Highs and Lows of an ADHD Diagnosis
One of the most common and important topics clients bring to ADHD coaching is the emotional impact of their diagnosis.
Most experience it as a steep rollercoaster ride, with seemingly contradictory emotions arriving in quick succession and sometimes all at once.
This rollercoaster can feel lonely.
Full awareness and rational explanations for these emotions often lag behind, leaving many ADHDers struggling to express what they are going through.
Without the right language or tools, sharing their experience can feel impossible. Talking through this journey with a qualified and experienced ADHD coach can be invaluable.
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Relief: The Emotional High
One of the first and strongest emotions ADHDers feel is relief.
Receiving an objective medical explanation for a lifetime of struggles can be profoundly validating. A realisation that you are not broken, lazy, or insufficient.
For many, an ADHD diagnosis provides permission to stop blaming themselves for feeling out of sync with the neurotypical world or for struggling to follow through with goals.
Imagine the countless times someone with undiagnosed ADHD has tried to explain why they couldn’t stick to a commitment, only to lack the words to express it.
A diagnosis reassures them that their struggles weren’t imaginary but linked to real neurological differences.
This new perspective fosters self-compassion and allows individuals to make peace with the chaos of the past.
It can be the beginning of seeing oneself as a whole, valuable human being.
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Grief: The Emotional Low
But where there is relief, there is also grief.
A diagnosis brings the realization that life could have unfolded differently. This often leads to “what if” thoughts:
- What if I had received support earlier?
- What if I hadn’t been so misunderstood for so many years?
- Could I have reached my full potential and avoided years of frustration?
This process can be deeply emotional, as ADHDers reflect on lost opportunities and past struggles that affected their confidence and joy in life.
Many eventually arrive at a painful but important question: Is it too late for me to make up for lost time?
Grief asks these difficult questions and challenges ADHDers to reevaluate their sense of self in light of this new understanding of their personal history.
Transformation Through ADHD Coaching
While grief is painful, it also creates space for growth and transformation.
This is where the rollercoaster ride takes an upward turn.
ADHD coaching provides a space where clients can process their emotions and recognise that the same traits that presented challenges in a neurotypical world.
Creativity, hyperfocus, resilience, and unconventional thinking are untapped strengths waiting to be realised.
This work isn’t done in a day, but it’s work worth doing. Find your treasure!
